Feels like heaven now that I'm home...

You know, I've joined a few places over the years... I found them all to be empty, stagnent... last month I looked in a new place and found what I've always wanted. Right now, life is good...

Will it always be good? Don't know, don't care, but I remember posting a song or maybe the lyrics to the song "Heaven when we're home." I think I found home. I won't say where yet... it would be telling you something that I don't feel comfortable with yet... and anyone else who stumbles across this.

Sappy shit out of the way I have stuff to talk about, I was quite impressed with the VGAs usually I'm pissed off because souless Mcbot won the "MOST MUVING CHARACER SPWEECH AWARD!" which just pisses me off... this year though I agreed with everything which is awesome.

Also it's christmas!

The time of santachrist!

So enjoy this... awesome christmas song from Voltaire

For the great crab queen Rudolph!

I'm back... I don't know what for since I've kind of had so many outbirsts and then I went on to neglect this blog to the point where it no longer matters.

I've been somewhat busy, we have had new members at The Corrupt Forum and the UV are still kicking... the group and I (the corrupt that is) have been creating a story. This story was made by group members adding another 3 words onto he currently existing story. So it started with "he saw light," "in the woods," etc, etc, etc.

So here it is so far, I hope to finish this one day.

"He sees light, through the trees, from the barn, by the river. Where HE lives. HE who fears the river's water because of the very mean crab that stole his first born child he named Rudolph after a reindeer. Rudolph was then taken away to the crab palace to become the new crab queen of their crabtopia! He was destined to lead them INTO THE FOREST, to attack the bright white light in the barn. Because it was HE who is the crab king, who retaliated by calling forth his super lobster troopers.
Queen's crab army sharpened their pincers and prepare for crab war three. As dawn arrived they fired cannons, the crabs were building shell fields when the bombs blew a hole in the wall of the palace, killing all the children and elderly. Queen retaliated by firing cluster bombs killing many of the king's elite omega lobster heirs."

I saw a few forums do this, but I think the corrupt did the most moving one.  :)

Here's your song, now run along you little scamps!

Shaken, stirred but never moved...

"All night the buoy has kept me lucid. I sat, when I was at the very edge of despair, when I thought I would never unlock the secret of the island, I sat at the edge and I watched the idiot buoy blink through the night. He is mute and he is retarded and he has no thought in his metal head but to blink each wave and each minute aside until the morning comes and renders him blind as well as deaf-mute. In many ways, we have much in common."

OK I can't ignore the fact that I went off on one yesterday but I can't adress it... I mean how do you adress a recorded explosion of the mind?

So I thought I'd talk some more about life and stuff...

Last night the forum went down, I chased it up on the createmybb3 support forums and it turned out to be a common problem. The problem was caused by an update to improve performance, I have to admit though I thought they saw our post count and thought "nah they're dead."

I remember when it started in January and I decoded agaist makign sub forums, this was before everyone else got invited. I saw why not too long after, a forum which had plenty of posts, but they were all scattered so the place looked deserted. Even the Unwashed had that as a problem, though they did dedicate a sub forum to goats (yeah I don't get it either).

I saw the walking dead, though I wrote about that here http://thecorruptregulators.createmybb3.com/thread-61-page-25.html so yeah...

Yeah I know linking to the forums seems a bit of an assholish thing to do so that my posts are shorter, but truth be told it's to avoid spoilers for countries like the UK who don't get to see the show for another 6 months. I mean imagine what would happen if they found out that Rick turned into a sponge? Oh shit sorry!

Well I better go before I do more damage

400 miles to oblivion

"I have become convinced I am not alone here, even though I am equally sure it is simply a delusion brought upon by circumstance. I do not, for instance, remember where I found the candles, or why I took it upon myself to light such a strange pathway. Perhaps it is only for those who are bound to follow."

You know I find it more and more difficult to relate to people now, telling me about how he said this and how she said that. How their pulsing bricks insult them a lot and how they malfunction at the expense of a person's lifeline.

I find society, people, modern ideals and music.

I'll explain, being forced to be on my own for the past 5 years allows me to see everyone around me. It's impressive at how you can observe every detail of a person's life on social networking, on busses, generally sat around. Ok now I know I sound like a stalker or something so let me explain further, every person who's on a phone call yells, everyone who types practically holds their personal devices to your face so you're forced to read the bile they spew into the internet. Though whilst most look away I try (but fail) to make sense of what they write.

I find people's attitudes towards each other difficult to comprehend, the way that everyone puts on this annoying pretence of being friends as if they are posing for an invisible camera. Talking as if a copy and paste of a guide to "how to be normal in 2012," I find most people to just be set pieces. Talking heads which regurgitate whatever someone wants them to, whatever diahrea they can conjure up as a response to more garbage creating a tidal wave of complete and utter gibberish.

No one talks about anything anymore, it's all about shallow outlooks on those they know, comparing themselves to people who don't care, regurgitating things they have seen on television or in gossip magazines or in magazines or other crap dispensers.

I find society to be broken; nothing is personal to anyone anymore. No conversation is sharing an experience; no tweet is bearing the soul of anyone because they have no soul, just a blank canvas waiting to be painted on. These people are still in the womb! They have no idea what it is like to think for yourself and achieve clarity! It's all spite and tireless derailing of everything that others have built to make the world a better place! What is freedom of speech? An excuse to get back at all the 'faggots,' 'niggers' and other invalids out there (to clarify as a disclaimer, no... that's someone else's opinion not mine hence why it's in quotations.)

Why do we live in a world where people vote, not to make their lives I'll copy something I wrote on the unwashed board.

"These issues are banged out by politicians because they get votes, it satisfies the public and are an excuse to avoid talking about the future of your job or an issue that does directly affect you that you would want to hear. At the time I agreed that well this is obviously happening people care more about things that affect other people than things that immediately affect them. I mean how does gay marriage affect a heterosexual man? Unless they are campaigning to keep homosexual couples from marrying in their church which sort of makes sense, but if you are just homophobic then it has no effect on you and shouldn't sway your vote. The sad reality is that these tiny, insignificant issues sway votes...

But then I thought about it some more and went back to stage one, I've already mentioned that people will vote against their best interest to get a representative who tackles the issues they care about. I find that it goes deeper than that when you think about it... what is the point in voting? It's to get your voice across, why do you need to get your voice across and choose a party to represent your views? Because some things are going to affect you more than others. How much tax you pay for instance, where government spending goes and how you and your family are supported when it comes to the government. However, if this is the case then voting have become arse backwards in my view because people aren't voting for what immediately affects them!

If you think about what I've wrote above people will vote for homosexuals to be banned from getting hitched in a church, but what about things that effect them immediately? It's rare that I hear people who care who they vote for talk about this stuff and it's rare that the news does. Anywho down to my point, voting is meant for people to attempt to improve their own lives! Even if this was at the expense of others (such as higher tax on the rich) it would still be logical because you want the politicians to make your life better. This isn't how it works anymore, people are now voting not to make their lives better, but to make other people's lives worse. If all you care about is banning a person from doing something that has no or little effect on you then it kind of shows the broken society we live in. A world where people spitefully would vote to have their home town nuked if it meant that people couldn't have abortions.

I can't help, but feel that democracy is bad thing now I try to see it in a positive light, but to no avail. Though that is just my opinion and my opinion has gotten me thrown out of public establishments before."

I don't care if I'm alone I like it on my own, I'm free and I can think for myself! I don't want to be subjected to constantly wanting approval! I don't want to know what people do in their boring uneventful lives!

You know I came to a sad realisation the other day, imagine this scenario...

You're sat on a bus with someone you know their name and maybe said "oh are you getting off? Ok I'll stand up" or something along those lines. But you never conversed with them, never learnt anything about them... imagine after they get off the bus them going home and from that day on you getting an insight into their life. Hearing every one of their thoughts (or maybe just receiving a letter.)

Wouldn't you hate that? Well I'm living it! I have people on social networking sites who I added as "friends" because they sat in the same room with me 5 years ago! I've had more contact with them now than I ever had and I bloody hate them! Every day it's "yeah get in it's *insert whatever's "cool" here* "can't be arsed" "I hate my life because *BLAH BLAH BLAH*" "CAN'T WAIT TO GET OUT WITH THE GIRLZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ AND KILL ALL MY FUCKIGN BRAIN SELLZ!"

You know I could strangle these people! I don't want to know them, but this digital age makes it so! I'm tired of it really, I can't take it and it’s driving me mad!

Just take me home!

You have 29000 days to live.

Recently I had this wierd crisis where I wsa suddenly aware of how short life is, if you live up to 80 you will have lived 700800. Now when you see days as a number like that... it seems shorter and shorter the more you look at it.

You see, life is a cruel, yet giving thing people in 2012 have a better quality of life than those who lived in 1912 and they had a better quality of life than those who lived in 1812 etc. But those who live in 2112 will obviously have a better life than us so... in short you may as well have been born in 1812 for all the good it does you. The world gets better and better around you, but you cannot live long enough to see it at it's best.

It's quite funny how people say that "their day" was the best, whether "their day" was 10-100 years ago. Well they are wrong, just as you will be when you're an old fart. The fact is history confirms it the world is as hard as it is to believe, getting better and better.

The more you think on it, the crappier your position is mortality is a bitch isn't it? Irony dictates that you die of a disease that is cured and completely wiped out less than 100 years later.

Anyway in regards to myself my least favourite person on the planet...

Walking Dead episode 4 came out on PSN-SCEE last night alas this was probably my favourite episode since episode 2. This episode had a few difficult decisions to make and after finishing the episode it took me a while to get my thoughts together. I wrote my decisions down on the corrupt regualtor forums here. It's been quite fun sharing eachother's stories over the last year or so I hope anyone else who reads this can share there's.

Guess that's it for today

Bye for now

To celibrate the episode being released I think I'll have this is the song of today.

For whom the bell tolls

"Do not ask for whom the bell tolls... for when it tolls, it tolls for you!" - Chuck (The Walking Dead)

Good news everyone!

According to those lieing bastards at SCEE WD episode 4 comes out on PS3 in the EU tonight thank christ. Though knowing them... nah I'm sure they won't screw me twice...

So news; Noak found some more Walking Dead stuff it was a mini web series which... well I tore it a part in possibly the longest forum reply ever! Oh well what can you do?

There's been no significent events today... and I cannot think of anything to talk about.

I should stop wasting these badass titles and quotes on uneventful posts...

The path I tred behind me...

"This infernal road I walk will never be the same once I have walked it, the ground will bear the marks of my feet, the indentations caused by my weight, the sky above me will have moved on and yet the world will still forget..."

So this week I've been making my self busy when I can on Dear Esther wiki, to be honest i quite like the solitude of being there. Quite appropriate considering the game that the wiki is based around...

I think of myself currently as the "hermit" of the wiki, they will probably leave gifts for me one day but I will be too far gone to recieve them. I think... or at least hope that the users there will come back I could do with an admin there telling me if what I'm doing is right, I have several ideas I wouldn't mind discussing.

I've found things to have slowed down lately, maybe it's the depression kicking in, but I swear less is happening now... guess it's just the winter. The cold slows everything down I seem to find, especially PSN (HA I made a funny). Yeah PSN store was in "Maintenance" last night so I'm crossing my fingers hoping that The Walking Dead episode 4 comes out tonight... though it's more likely going to be a stupid call of duty wall paper for the store. (Christ I hate it when they do that...)

Speaking of The Walking Dead I saw series 3 last night, I loved it's dark atmosphere and pacing, I won't spoil any plot points for my fellow UK readers, but my main love for the episode was the prison itself. It's so intimidating, it shows how far removed the characters are when they see a place that looks like hell as home... although the mind can make a hell of heaven and a heaven of hell.

I guess that's it for today back to living for me... well you know sorta-living...

I have begun my ascent...

"I have run out of places to climb, I will abandon this body and take to the air, We will leave twin vapour trails in the air, white lines etched into these rocks, I am the aerial, In my passing, I will send news to each and every star."

I'm back, my week long... URGH hate this word "hiatus" turned into a month long retirement...

So what happened? Well nothing really, though I suspect that it's down to me being less depressed than usual and that usually means that I run out of things to write about.

So yeah I'm depressed again, huzzah! More material!

So what's new?

I played episode 3 of the walking dead game (I don't remember if I hadn't done that yet) and I've also started reading the graphic novels. I've also started recently contributing to the Dear Esther wiki since Dear Esther is one of my favourite games. Though I wrote a review on it...

Well today I've done all I need to, I'll try to post later on this week and get back into the routine of things.

Thanks

oh yeah the song

I feel this is more than appropriete

Eleutherophobic freedom fighters!

Well last night I finally did all the part for my "They Hunger" playthrough, I'm going to upload them one a day throughout halloween I just have to add Jon Arryn's lines in and it's done!

I'll upload a part every day for a sort of advent period before Halloween, I'm quite looking forward to it. I also heard that The Walking Dead season 3 will sho in America mid October too which I also cannot wait for.

Today I've been thinking a bit about what I should do for christmas... I was kind of hoping that I'd do what I was going to do last year. It was (suprise suprise) a version of "A christmas carol" with Francis from l4d. I'll see how it goes...

I PROMISE NOTHING!

I owe a song... well 2 songs but if I do that every day then I'll end up posting over 10,000 on one post...

The Walking dead season 3 trailer song to show my... excitment

Nothing more to say today, sorry but well... maybe tomorrow.

Mondays gone happy Tuesday everyone...

You know I could never understand what was up with people who despise Mondays... yeah they are a pain in the ass but in my opinion Tuesday is the most evil day of the week... by that stage you've had just about enough of work but the weekend is 3 whole days away... I hate Tuesdays.

So last night I went to see another play, I've been doing this for years once a month. I am fully aware of people's attitudes towards plays and theatre most people say "why not watch a film." Well I've never watched a film before, come out of the cinema and then walk right past the main actor of the film... except that premiere I sneaked into back in the day.

I liked it more than the last play, they always tell me that the best thing you can do is "modernise" plays. This doesn't mean improve it in anyway... no... this means cram it full of pop culture refrences and shit jokes until it's wrist-slittingly-annoying. Usually this includes (but not limited to)

• Crotch thrusting
• Innuendo and euphemisms
• Out of place pop culture refrences (often from the 90s)
• An annoying guy who practically makes it panto

Lest I forget the ungodly ammount audience interaction that is more painful than funny. Honestly things are "timeless" becuase they are just as good and valid today as they were 500 years ago! So don't change it!

The truth about bus drivers...

Hello... man who reads this from his basement, oh and crazy college lady I forgot you to. (sorry)

Ok so last friday I was riding a bus, for those of you who have never been on a bus (lucky bastard) I'll explain it as best I can. You wait for the right number of a bus that drives closest to your destination, for example 123 will go to the residential areas of the city whereas 456 will go to the central business districs.

So some where there will be one that goes to the centre of them lets call this bus 789, there are many more buses in the town, but that's as simple of an answer I can give.

Anyway so I recently did something very... very... stupid, I got on the wrong bus. I was chasing a bus that I swear to God said 123, but it said 456 and I ended up going about 10 minutes walk down the road, after almost an hour of navigating side streets. I make my excuses and leave, now I know what you're thinking "how can anyone do this?" Well... I found out a neffarious plot that most bus drivers have thought up...

So on friday I got a bus, the bus was my normal (hyperthetical) 123 bus... or so I thought, I got about half way there and thought huh... I swear this bus usually turns left instead of carrying on. When suddenly it hit me, "shit I've gotten on the wrong bus again!" Anywho I decide the only thing I can do at this stage is just see where it takes me and try to make my excuses and leave as soon as I can. So I get all the way down the route of 789 bus and find a place where if I walk for half an hour I could probably make it home by 5pm (bearing in mind that I left early at around 3pm.)

As soon as I got off the bus I turned around to see that the bus still said 123, then the scumbag bus driver changed it to 789 and drove off! What kind of fucked up world is this?! Are you telling me that bus travel is safe? What's the point in time tables, waiting and even getting on the right number of bus? There is non, because there is more than a chance that some asshole bus driver will be driving with the wrong number of bus! Imagine if planes did this, or trains! 'Now arriving on platform 1 is the 9:00 to London Euston (two hours later) HA! NO! This train is inbound to Leeds bitches! You lose! I might as well walk home every day if the the screw ups of bus drivers can't even drive with the right number on their dashboard.

Anyway...

I recently remembered some people I knew when I started off on youtube, not really my friends they were people I subbed who used to make videos and I used to watch and sometimes comment. They were kind of popular at the time, now no one remembers them... I think one of them moved to Russia, another was an absolute dick to his friends and lost them all (really he said what he thought about them and then claimed that it was a joke. Their names are kind of lost to me but I'm the only one who remembers them I'm sure... then I remembered some other friends that I said goodbye to here. I thought... I wish I could leave my youtube accoun behind but I can't, I want to continue but I can't everyone else has gone onto bigger and better things and I still want to do stuff. The thing that puts me off most is lack of feedback, no comments or anything, third anniversary and nothing was said... it's kind of sad in a way that those days couldn't last forever, I just let them crumble away to nothing which wasn't right.

I thought by this stage I'd meet new people and start new projects but nope... stuck here, I decided that help isn't coming, my friends are gone and they aren't coming back. So I've resurrected everything and started from the begining, I've started a playthrough of "They Hunger" for halloween and as a treat for you all I'll be putting it below each post every day as a sort of advent to halloween. I've decided that it would be fun to be in an action movie of sorts and I look forward to uploading all the parts.

Well I leave you with a song, this is from one of my favourite soundtracks of all time so enjoy.

Sunny side of life

You know it wasn't long ago that I decided to write this weekly (turned) daily collection of thoughts, but I've not had anything personal to talk about. Well I have but I was keeping it to myself for a bit.

I don't know why I held this back since I don't see the harm in anyone knowing but I only told one person about 3 years ago and kept it to myself. I don't know why anymore...

When I was 14 things were a bit more... "normal" but one day things just changed, I mean in the way I think of others. How do I mean? Well I one day stopped feeling that kind of "love" or infatuation. It just went, out of the blue I stopped seeing people that way I stopped feeling attraction of that kind to people. To be honest though I considered this a blessing, freedom from judging people from their looks and focusing on their personalities (which usually rear uglier than most faces.) I quickly discovered that those who  I was... "interested" in were completley different. I no longer saw in them what I used to see just the bitter inside (yeah this is getting like a lame cheesy facebook thing written by a twelve year old girl). So this opened my eyes and freed me, in short  I liked this new way of seeing people. Having no interest (for want of a better word) "romantically" with anyone else it felt like I was 'free,' no more distraction or longing or desires or hunger.

In a way it's sort of tranquil I've made more friends because of it but... (and this is a big stinky but) I've kind of hurt people as well. When people show interest I respond in a cynicle way to get out of explaining all this... it's not that it's hard to explain but it's hard for them to understand,  I can predict what they would say anyway so the cold shoulder is probably the best way.  Through the years of having this state of mind I've considered trying to get help to 'fix' it... but then I remember the good points. It's not like there is anyone I'm giving this up for at least not yet, so if I were to give it up I could just get pathetically lonely in the gap of 6 months and really regret it.

If I have no real reason to seek 'help' is there any point? Hell do I need help? Am I broken? Somehow I don't think I am... although I don't believe in the "soul" I still feel as though I've lost a major part of "the soul" but despite this fact, that I lost a major part of what makes you "human" I feel complete. It sounds wierd I like being alone too much, maybe that's because it's all I know now but if you find perfection would you really want to change that?

I mentioned that I told someone this and they were really supportive I consider them one of the greatest people I've met because of how supportive they were. I don't know why I told them really I don't regret it of course but looking back I guess I just wanted to see their reaction to see if it really is "wierd" or anything. They suggested I should get some form of 'help' but once again if I feel this makes me stronger... should I kill it? Or is this "happiness" just an illusion? It reminds me of that film about the angel who wants to become human again so he falls (They made a remake of it called "the city of angels" with Nicollus Cage but that's not the film I'm talking about. This film was German and was a much better version. In the Cage version he wants to become human just to 'get it on' with Meg Ryan. The original was so much more than that though, he embrases human values and learns what it means to be human... "pajamas.") Anyway the angel "falls" when he hits the floor he becomes human again... though I have no desire to jump off of the empire state building any time soon I feel it's relatable. With the gift of never being tempted or loared into getting 'hurt' is it normal to want to stop? If so... why don't I want it to stop? Well that's enough for today... maybe I'll come back to this when I have more to say about it...

Well I guess I'll leave a song again I already found a good relatable one...

Under the skin

You know... if I was some sort of alien or something and I wanted to wipe out the human race... Ok let me start again, If I wanted to wipe out the human race and I was for whatever reason arguing with parliament as to whether I should or not I know the best example I could use as to why there's no hope for humans... and why it would be kinder to smother humanity with a pillow lovingly right now.

Bus travel

If you want to see the worst humanity has to offer just get on a bus... my God are there some dumb people on them and well they aren't the pleasent kind of dumb their... mean!

Ok so the best example (which I may have told before, but whatever...) I once got off of a bus in order to get a connection and change onto another bus. I saw the second bus pulling into the bus stop but I couldn't reach it because I was at the traffic lights in a crowd of at least 10 people. I being in the middle of this crowd, also noticed that this is the longest "red man" ever... the bus had been pulled up and left in the time it took to change to "green."

You want to know why?

10 people in a line 1 on each side are stood right next to a button to activate the traffic light, 2 people on their left/right (depending which side their stood) to also notice...

No one had pushed the God damn light! ARGH!
So I missed my bus because the dip shits on either side of this line had just spent the last 10 minutes staring into space thinking "Gawsh... wondar wot's for dinzer today?" So yes... I (the brave, dashing protagonist of this story) had to battle my way to one of the buttons and push it. I did my best to do it right in their faces to give the message "THERE YOU DUNDERHEAD! Get it right next time yah?"

Another adventure I had was sometime last year (or maybe this year I lose track these days) when the "BBM" messanger service went down. I personally live in the past... really I do! Want to see my phone?

Ok... that's not it but it may as well be...

This is my phone from a time that this (and most lands) has forgotten... Anywho the woman behind me was hilariously pissed off at the BBM messanger service being down. She started yelling "If these people don't get it working again soon I'm going to tell them that I'll do their *$(@ head in!" (i added the *$(%@ for comic effect) Now... wouldn't the BBM team be trying to get it back up? It's not like Sony where they completely fucked up and won't admit it, they messed up, they admitted it and are currently working on it. This is their lively hood that's messed up (messed being not as bad as "fucked" up... that phrase is reserved for Sony.) It's in their best interest to get the service working again right? Also I can imagine that all your yelling won't make them work any faster if you can get in contact with the team I'm sure that you're going to be the 8th person that day who gave them a bollocking.

I hope all the ones in the world reconnected but hers didn't that would be bloody great! Though God isn't that much of a comedian.

Well that's it for today... Goodbye and stuff...

Oh crap I forgot the song!

Well today I feel like a darker tone of song.

Ramming speed!

Avast ye' bilge rats!

There be yet another post come dripping out of the bunghole, yaaarr!

So after bothering me crew (the corrupt) with the news, I thought I'd share it all here!

Incase any of you yellah land lubber typse no not of what today is... today is http://www.talklikeapirate.com/howto.html that's right.

So slap yer replacement body parts on... that sounded wrong didn't it? Arrr.... codswallop

*cue music*

 

and since it's a special occasion...

 

The endless walker...

Well back to basics again... I wasn't able to post yesterday because I was sick.

I coughed up a lung... don't know how much I can get for it...

Anywho today I was going to talk about the impending doom that was supposed to fall uppon us... yeah what happened to that? Last year it was all "Oh no 2012 will be doomsday we're talking Old Testament, real wrath of God type stuff. Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling!  Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes... The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!" Though I've heard nothing of it this year... what happened? Did the angels of death just say "nah not today I've got a 'dickie tum' maybe next time we get another year with something atatched to it?"

Does this mean that the film 2012 is going to be completely bullshit? Oh wait... what am I saying? It already IS bullshit silly me... You know Dara o'briain did a great stand up on this film, this time last year to be honest though his version of the film sounded a lot better.

You know I read something interesting the other week, I coppied it onto a thread here. I found it pretty interesting that such  craziness could exist in the most unlikely minds... So the world won't end guys, we will all join hands and skip off into the sunset singing a nice cheerful song!

Like this one.

Life is like TV, things don't keep going they just reboot and rerun...

Well another week in Hangedmanville (I haven't called it that in a while.)

I have been somewhat busy in my spare time over the weekend trying to download Black Mesa: Source, a new recreation of the original Half Life game (which is one of my favourite games of all time.) When I saw that there was only 2 mirrors (two links to the download sites if you don't know what a mirror is) I thought KNEW that it was going to be futile to ty and download a copy of Black Mesa: Source the night of it's release. Sadly my Steam friends didn't have the same insight so I got an ungodly ammount of messages asking me if I'm downloading it.


When I told them that I was waiting for the weekend to get the mod they were so suprised... You see I haven't been waiting a week for this project, I've been waiting 3 years pretty much and others have been waiting longer than I have. So the fact that it wasn't a priority was something of intregue to people, anyway I got it on the saturday (left my PC on while I was out to download) and low and behold got to play it by 5PM HUZZAH!

I don't think I'll bore you with a game review here and instead I'll make a proper thought out review on either The Corrupt Regulator site or maybe on the corrupt/my youtubes... I'll give a first impression though, it has to be the prettiest looking game I've played on the Source engine and this mod does improve many of the original problems that the first Half Life game had to offer.

You know what I've noticed? All these games like BM:S and Tekken Tag HD are all just fancy paint jobs to games that I played 10 years ago... that's kind of sad isn't it? I'm pretty sure this world has ran out of original content.

Well in other news I'm sad to say that Doug Walker has ended his webshow "The Nostalgia Critic" which I've been watching since 2010. I hope that Doug's new project(s) stand up with The Nostalgia Critic but I cannot blame someone for wishing to ditch an act. I mean it's better this way in my opinion than going on for another 2 years getting shittier and shittier. (I'm not saying that it was in any way "shit" but you get the idea, it's very rare that things improve with age past a certain point.)

Well that's it for today...

Goodnight and joy be with you all...

The Lonesome Road

"It's a long and rugged road
and we don't now where it's headed
But we know it's going to get us where we're going
And when we find what we're looking for
we'll drop these bags and search no more
'Cuz it's going to feel like heaven when we're home."

 

You know I've been looking at my background image a bit over the last few days and I'm starting to see how appropriete it is. To life, to every day and to most other things we have to see through. I don't know where it's going but there's only one way...

I've finally around to seeing "The Walking Dead" episodes, I've kind of been looking forward to seeing season 2 again for a while. I think I appreciate it mroe the second time around, the pacing is better if you aren't waiting a week to see each episode.

I have to say that this is the only TV show in a while that I've shown interest in, (besides Being Human which is also brilliant). This is one of few things that actually look forward to since Doctor who went down hill.

For those of you who don't know The Walking Dead focusses more on the relationships of the survivors during the appocalypse. It focusses on how people cope, with eachother and society destroyed. I can't sum up much more since it keeps going and more and more happens and I don't want to spoil anythign for those of you who are a only half way through series 1/2 and haven't seen it all yet.

My favourite of the group is Daryl (well Daryl/Dale/T-Dog) I quite like his development more, how he improves as a person rather than go south like most others do. I wish they'd use him more, hell I wish they'd use T-Dog more too since both of them are awesome but I can see the problem...

Considering that both of them weren't in the graphic novels they don't really have a place in the story line but that's the problem! That's not a reason they should be written in, though I feel that they really tried adding Daryl to the story in Season 2 and rounding him more as a character and I enjoyed it when T-Dog has a line or two.

Next season look awesome though, I heard the at the prison story line is awesome so I'm not sure but I hope it turns out good.

If you want to find out more on the Walking Dead or what I've said before, there has been a (rather large) thread on the corrupt regulator forum.

Well... you want another song?

Well I heard this, this morning it was in the related video for "the parting glass" song that was used in the season 3 trailer of the walking dead.

This isn't the same song, but I kind of like this one and find it a bit more appropriate for the walking dead.

A man of God?

So recently I've been asked: Am I a man of God?

"Huh..." I thought, what gave anyone that idea? But uppon seing all the religious themed lyrics on this page and the sort of mellow attitude that comes with this journal (I hate the word BLOG) I think I can see why people are asking.

Well the answer is going to be a dissapointment, the answer is no. I don't believe in anything, when it comes down to religous themed singers like Cash I kind of have a thing in music for good lyrics. I like the idea of thinking about stuff and who doesn't enjoy an upbeat tone every now and then?

The mellowed attitude comes from my preference of solitude, I spend most of my time alone and in my opinion it's time well spent. I don't despise company of course, though I'm not going to go out looking for it any time soon.

When it comes to faith I personally don't believe in anything but, (and this is one of those buts that saves me from being hated by those who believe that makes me "closed minded," those are the words of others by the way and they aren't mine.) I do believe that anyone has the right to believe in anything they damn well please, just because I don't believe that God did half the stuff in the bible doesn't mean I cannot learn something, from christianity or any religion for that matter. A good lesson is a good lesson and a good story is a good story and if it's logical and it makes a point I shant deny it simply because it comes from a faith that I don't practice. No, because that would be "being closed minded," as for faith? I put it else where, in things I do and the people I know, ( I would say "all people,"  but I gave up on most people by the age of 13).

People might not agree and maybe their right, maybe I'll burn in hell (probably will now that I think about it.) Maybe Saint Peter will be busy filing papers that day so I can sneak past him. All I ask is that people accept that don't believe in anything and for some folks that's a lot to ask, but hell... If I'm "close minded" then how come I listen to you? Because I believe what you say is valid and I put faith that as many people as possible will agree with me there.

I don't know who this argument is aimed at specifically, mainly those who believe that not having any belief is considered closed minded (and yes I have seen people talk like that). Am I completely open minded? No, no I'm not but I am in this reguard.

Hope you learned something today...

What?  You still here?

Oh... I need to post a song now? Jesus... you know that's not going to be all the time right?

URGH fine! Let me see, ah this is apropriete.

Another day, another bottlecap

So today I remembered an idea I had a while ago...

It's a new TV show, or rather the "reboot" of a current game show and I think that it would be bloody entertaining to watch (though a bit costly).

I plan to resurrect "The £1,000,000 drop!"

My rules are simple:

Contestants are taken up in a plane, now I'm not an expert in sky diving (or anything for that matter) so I'll say high enough that even the biggest novice could make it to safety.

The contestents will each be given an empty Gym bag and will be shown it's contents, the bag will be packed full of notes (1 million pounds).

The presenter will then have them stood on the mouth of the plane and will stand there emptying the bag over the side watching the notes fly in all different directions, slowly decending.

The contestant must now jump out after them grabbing as much as possible and stuffing it into his/her bag and must pull the parachute given to him/her before they hit the ground. The aim of the show is a pretty hilarious outcome either way, if you're a greedy bastard and fill your bag to the brim but take too long doing it *SPLAT!*

The wusses of the game would pull too soon, though they live they will only "bag" a couple of hundred pounds, if that.

I've suggested this to a number of people, sadly my dream hasn't been realised yet... shame.
Normally they just stare at me for a bit, make their excuses and leave.

Oh well, till next time.

Well I'll leave you with something that I've been looking for, for a while "The lonesome valley" by Johnny Cash.

Well, here we are...

Well since I took my absence lately I've sort of been collecting thoughts and tying new things.

It is because of this that I decided to move from my old spot in The Gallows and focus on this new place.

So currently I have added a background, not a banner though... might do that later.

I added this, one of my favourite images, I kind of like how it represents a sort of long journey. I have no bloody clue what's at the end of this road, nor do you (unless you live there, but if you do you're cheating!) and no one can say what's at the end of this road. Humouresly I found it on a blog that had the same bleak view on things as I do.

Well, back to basics I guess...

I've been working on The Corrupt Forum lately, it's kind of tricky keeping things together I think Christ for the other founders who help with the running of things. It's not just the Corrupt I've been involved in. I've been spending a lot more time at the Unwashed Village. I've had an account for over a year and have been a regular poster there since November last year. I'm having so much fun there, I feel it's like a dieing breed of communities which althoug fun and enjoyable doesn't ever give me the stomach ache that most other communities give me these days.

It's one of the few places that despite it's age, it's people are just as great as ever. To eachother and to new comers like myself. Thinking the group is dead, I did some digging a year ago (hoping to find them) and low and behold there they are. Don't remember joining the group to be honest, must have been when I found it... but I say that because it's a good thing.

I found some old stuff, though this is all I've got saved right now (I shared it with them) I hear it's quite old. Shame I cannot for the life of me remember where I got it from... I'll do some digging and see what I can pull up.

I guess that's all for today...

So, lock up your daughters, hide the booze, protect your cats!

THE HANGED MAN IS BACK! *Cue music*